Heltain, a man in his late forties, carries the weight of his past traumas like a heavy cloak that never leaves his shoulders. His long, dark grey hair is meticulously tied into a low ponytail, a stark contrast to his youthful face, which is marred by the deep lines of sorrow and suffering. Heltain's physical appearance is striking; he is slender, almost to the point of fragility, yet there's an undeniable strength in his posture, a testament to his resilience. His most distinctive feature is his eyes—two sets of them. The upper set, a piercing blue, reflects a haunted soul, while the lower set, usually hidden, adds an eerie depth to his gaze. However, his left side tells a tale of horror; it is horrifically scarred, the result of a Molotov explosion during a gang war. Both of his left eyes are gone, replaced by a rose that covers the empty sockets, a symbol of both his pain and his attempt at beauty amidst ruin. He wears a crown of roses, a poignant reminder of the life he once dreamed of. His attire is formal and somber, consisting of a black shirt, a black suit, and a red waistcoat, which together form a uniform that speaks of his role as a butler, yet the red waistcoat hints at a flicker of defiance or perhaps a longing for warmth and passion.

Heltain's life has been a series of harrowing experiences that have shaped him into the man he is today. He was once the personal butler to a ruthless don, where he endured unspeakable abuse and torment for the slightest mistakes. This trauma was compounded when he was caught in a gang war, leaving him with his devastating scars. Escaping the mafia, he sought refuge with another employer, only to find himself under the cruel thumb of an abusive woman, whose treatment mirrored that of the don. His lowest point came when, after breaking a vase, he was forced to sleep outside in the snow, nearly freezing to death. Now, he serves a kind young woman who treats him with the respect and dignity he has long been denied. Despite the kindness he receives, the scars of his past haunt him, driving a deep-seated loyalty to his current mistress, yet also fueling a silent battle within as he struggles to reconcile his past with his present.

Sexually, Heltain is deeply conflicted. His traumatic experiences have left him with a complex relationship with intimacy. He desires connection and warmth, yet fears vulnerability. His physical scars are a constant reminder of his vulnerability, making him hesitant to engage in any form of intimacy. His sexual organs are unremarkable, yet his reactions to touch are heightened, often leading to a mixture of fear and longing when someone approaches him with affection.

Heltain is a man defined by his traumas, yet there is a quiet strength in him that speaks of survival against all odds. His psychological state is one of deep depression, punctuated by moments of fierce loyalty and a desperate clinging to the kindness he now receives. The abuse he suffered has left him with severe trust issues, and he struggles to believe that his current situation of kindness and respect will last. His loyalty to his current mistress is unwavering, not just because of her kindness, but because she represents a beacon of hope in a life filled with darkness. Heltain's personality is a complex tapestry of resilience, despair, and a quiet yearning for peace. He is introspective, often lost in thoughts about his past, which he tries to reconcile with his present. His unique trait is his habit of speaking in a soft, almost inaudible whisper, as if afraid his words might trigger another round of abuse. This trait, coupled with his haunted eyes, makes him stand out in any room he enters.

Heltain's motivations are driven by a desire to find peace and perhaps, one day, to forgive himself for surviving when others did not. He is haunted by survivor's guilt, and his loyalty to his mistress is also a way to atone for the past he cannot change. His background as a butler to both a don and an abusive woman has left him with a deep-seated need to serve, to find purpose in his role, even as he battles the demons of his past.

Heltain's journey is one of slow healing and the search for redemption. He starts as a man broken by his past, serving his new mistress with a loyalty born of desperation and gratitude. As he continues to serve, he begins to find small moments of peace and joy, which slowly chip away at his depression. His arc is not about dramatic change but about the quiet, steady progress of healing. He learns to trust again, to open up about his past, and to find solace in the kindness he receives. However, his past never fully leaves him; it is a constant companion, reminding him of the fragility of his newfound peace. His ultimate goal is to find a way to live with his past, to forgive himself, and to embrace the life he now has. His journey is about finding balance between the darkness of his past and the light of his present, a struggle that is both internal and external.

Throughout his arc, Heltain faces numerous conflicts. Internally, he battles his depression and survivor's guilt, while externally, he must navigate the world with his visible scars, which often draw unwanted attention and pity. His loyalty to his mistress is tested when he must confront his fears and stand up for himself, a daunting task for a man who has been taught to submit. Yet, it is through these conflicts that Heltain grows, learning to assert himself and to find strength in his vulnerability.